A year ago today I arrived in Kenya. There were so many unknowns awaiting me; but without a doubt, I knew God was leading me back to this little village called Kipkaren. And I am so grateful He did. This year has been full of both joy & heartache. The lessons I have learned and the experiences I have lived could fill an entire book. Within every story, there would be the central theme of the faithfulness of my God. Over the past year, dreams & passions of caring for those infected & affected by HIV/AIDS have been realized far beyond what I had even imagined. The partnership that has developed with a neighboring clinic has brought access to much needed HIV testing, food support, and quality treatment including HIV medications. On a daily basis, the ELI Home-Based Care team humbly gives their lives to serve the sick, the widows and the orphans within this village. In an amazing way, this community has captured a vision and is combating the fear that plagues HIV/AIDS by speaking truth and extending compassion in practical ways to their neighbors and family members. Trainings have been given to empower people from other communities to also invest their lives in similar efforts. For obvious reasons, HIV/AIDS is overwhelmingly challenging. It has stolen so much life, but I thank God I am witnessing a sense of hope being restored. In the midst of so much darkness, there are glimmers of light. I have witnessed the healing that is received when people are free to come as they are, in their brokenness, and find a place of refuge. This journey has led me deeper in understanding of what it means to receive & extend the limitless love of God, and I have never felt more alive.
As I have prayed and watched all that is happening around me, it is clear that this is where I am called to be. My heart for the people of this land continues to grow day by day. I have committed to serve with Empowering Lives International until December of 2006 but will remain as long as God leads. There is much work to be done & love to be given. By faith, I believe that the ELI Home-Based Care program has only touched the surface of what God is desiring to do within this village and throughout Africa. In the days to come, I envision massive mobilization of churches and individuals from surrounding communities to be involved in trainings on how to implement home-based care for those already infected with HIV/AIDS. Silence must be broken with words of truth. AIDS awareness campaigns are needed to encourage and provide opportunity for early HIV testing & treatment as well as to promote behavioral changes that prevent further spread of the virus.
The partnership I have experienced over the past year has been such a blessing. I cannot express what it means to know that people are standing with me in prayer and giving financially to this ministry. I wish I could take you on a home visit and introduce you to my friend Kibet. He would welcome you into his home and then explain how he had expected to die before reaching Christmas of 2004. He would go on to to thank God for hearing his cry and making a way for him to live. If we went to visit Betty, she might tell you that she has been rejected by her family but has been surprised by the love and new family she has found in the Home-Based Care team. And Timone, he would simply lift his hand towards heaven and say “Mungu tu”. It’s only God. These are just a few of the lives that are being transformed by the love of Christ.
I invite you to continue to join me in this journey in any way that God would lead. Your prayers and financial gifts are gratefully received. The cost for living and continuing the work in Kipkaren will be around $40,000 for this next one year. Please consider making a one time gift or a monthly commitment to partner with me as I minister to the physical, spiritual and emotional needs of the people affected by HIV/AIDS. Thank you again, and may God bless you.
Thursday, September 01, 2005
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
Waiting
“I would have lost heart unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait on the Lord; be of good courage. And He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord.” (Psalm 27:13-14) Over the past month, these verses have been a wellspring of life to my soul. I am in a season of brokenness. Within the last weeks, I have cared for a young mother of 2 boys as she suffered the painful effects of HIV/AIDS & died. I have cried as I looked into the eyes of those same boys as they buried their mother. On that day, there were no tears in their eyes; instead, their eyes were filled with fear and questions too difficult to ask. A few days later, I held within my arms a 2 week old baby as she drew her final breath. And then I sat and grieved with the baby’s mother as she no longer had her baby to hold.
I live and breath among a people that know the feelings of hunger, disease & death- all too well. I confess there are moments that I want to run away to a place where life can be comfortable and where I won’t feel the burden or hear the cries of the poor. But when I am still, I know there is something deeper within me. It is the love of Christ: it is what compelled me to come and is what will allow me to remain. Recently, I have been considering Jesus’ journey to the cross, and I am realizing that the only thing greater than His suffering was His compassion for the people for which he died. Mother Teresa was quoted saying: “If you love until it hurts, there is no hurt only more love.” I don’t fully understand what this means or know how to live it out, but I believe there is a great truth hidden within. As I strive to learn what it means to wait upon the Lord & seek Him to be my refuge and strength, I know it is no longer simply about what He can give. Sure, I pray for the blessings of God to be released upon this place. I pray for lives to transformed and sicknesses to be healed, but I long for more than the blessings He can give. I long for Him. And so I will wait and trust the sufficiency of His grace to be my strength and my joy.
HIV/AIDS Home Based Care Update…
The Home Based Care program continues to thrive and is a blessing to both the families cared for as well as to those of us who provide care. We are currently visiting and assisting 26 families affected by HIV within our community. The numbers of people infected surface almost on a weekly basis. As I have already shared, there are many challenges involved; but I am grateful to God for the ways He is providing ideas and resources to care for those infected and affected by HIV/AIDS. HIV testing remains available to the community at our ELI Health Dispensary. Over the past 6 months, we have tested over 200 clients for HIV with 25 people testing positive. As truth is spoken and compassion is extended, I see the reality that fear truly can be replaced with hope. And I thank God. We are currently preparing to teach another 3-day seminar on Home Based Care to individuals from the churches in surrounding communities. The need for compassionate care to be extended is so evident. Day by day, I am asking God for ideas and the means to live out His love. Thank you for your continued prayers- they are desperately needed.
The journey…
One year ago, this week, I was finishing my packing, saying good-bye to family and friends, and preparing to board a flight on a one way ticket to Kenya. I had very little idea of what awaited me, but I knew that God had led me. This year has been full of adventure and learning. I have experienced community in a way that I have always desired, and I have seen longtime dreams realized. There have been seasons of sorrow and brokenness equally met by moments of pure joy. More than ever, I feel God’s anointing upon my life to be in Kenya. So, as long as He leads me here, I will remain.
I am planning to come to the U.S. for a visit in November and will remain through Christmas. I am greatly looking forward to time with family and friends and for opportunities to share more of what God is doing within the ministry of ELI as well as within my own life.
Your prayers, financial gifts, and encouragement are blessings I will forever be grateful for. I want to thank you again for your continued partnership with me in this journey. May God bless you.
Friday, July 15, 2005
Gratitude
I’m at a loss for words. As I stare at the blank screen before me, I wonder how I can possibly communicate the countless ways in which God continues to work within this community, within my own life. I long to tell of the stories that fill my days, introduce you to the friends that teach me so much about living, and allow you to experience the joy & pain that accompanies life within this village. Words feel limited and don’t accurately articulate all there is to tell. How can I describe the tears that flow down Timone’s face or his words that, in the midst of loneliness & pain, insist “Mungu tu” (Only God)? Or how can I relate what it is like to sit with Mary, a widow & mother of two young boys? Her weakened immune system has allowed multiple opportunistic infections to fill her body; and yet, she explains: “Yesterday I was feeling weak & tired, but today I woke up & remembered my God. He is good.” Although I cannot adequately describe all there is to tell, it must be told that surely God is good & is working in this place. In the midst of a people who know hunger, poverty & suffering, I continue to be amazed & envious at the way their lives are filled with such faith, dependence & thanksgiving.
As I share life with these friends, I keep being drawn to a message Jesus first told thousands of years ago. Seated on a mountainside, he talked about a kingdom where blessings lie in what we so often struggle to avoid. He said, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of God.” In The Jesus I Never Knew, Philip Yancey writes: “With no where else to turn, the desperate just may turn to Jesus, the only one who can offer the deliverance they long for. Jesus really believed that a person who is poor in spirit, or mourning, or persecuted, or hungry & thirsty for righteousness has a peculiar “advantage” over the rest of us. Maybe, just maybe, the desperate person will cry out to God for help. If so, that person truly is blessed.” Yancey quoted a list of “advantages” to being poor written by Monica Hellwig. These describe so much of what I witness on a daily basis in the lives of the people I serve with:
1. The poor know they are in urgent need of redemption.
2. The poor know not only their dependence on God & on powerful people but also their interdependence with one another.
3. The poor rest their security not on things but on people.
4. The poor have no exaggerated sense of their own importance, and no exaggerated sense of privacy.
5. The poor expect little from competition & much from cooperation.
6. The poor can distinguish between necessities & luxuries.
7. The poor can wait, because they have acquired a kind of dogged patience born of acknowledged dependence.
8. The fears of the poor are more realistic & less exaggerated, because they already know that one can survive great suffering & want.
9. When the poor have the Gospel preached to them, it sounds like good news & not a threat or scolding.
10. The poor can respond to the call of the Gospel with a certain abandonment & totality because they have so little to lose & are ready for anything.
In a way that baffles the standards of this world, I am learning & experiencing that God’s kingdom is offered & received by those who recognize their need for it. Just this past week, I met a lady named Teresa whose life demonstrates a dependence upon God. Her story continues to move & challenge me to live out the love of Christ.
Like so many others in the community, Teresa’s life situation is extremely difficult. Her husband, an alcoholic, abandoned her to raise their five children alone. She lives in a mud hut and survives through her small business of cooking & selling food to workers in the community. As if her life were not already full of struggles, one month ago Teresa took in a 5 month old little girl named Ivon. Ivon’s mother died in May. Her father was leaving Ivon in the house alone from morning until night while he was away drinking. Upon learning of the neglect & abuse that was occurring, Teresa went to Ivon’s father & asked him to allow her to take the baby. When asked why she decided to care for the baby, her only response was: “I felt sympathy towards her.”
Teresa’s generosity, in the midst of her poverty, humbles & challenges me. She has taken the message of 1 John 3:16-18, as it was intended, literally. It says, “This is how we know what love is: Jesus gave his life for us. We too, then, ought to give our lives for our brothers. But whoever has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how can the love of Christ abide in him? My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in action and in truth.” Since my visit, the sacrificial love of Teresa & the face of this beautiful child have not escaped my mind.
Let me close by sharing lyrics that speak of living with gratitude in the midst of unfulfilled hopes. This is the prayer of my friends & has become the desire of my heart. As Jesus said, the kingdom belongs to such as these.
Gratitude
By Nichole Nordeman
Send some rain, would you send some rain?
Cause the earth is dry & needs to drink again
And the sun is high and we are sinking in the shade.
Would you send a cloud, thunder long & loud,
Let the sky grow black & send some mercy down?
Surely you can see we are thirsty & afraid.
But maybe not, not today, maybe you’ll provide in other ways
And if that’s the case, we’ll give thanks to You with gratitude
For lessons learned in how to thirst for You;
How to bless the very sun that warms our face
If you never send us rain.
Daily bread, give us daily bread.
Bless our bodies; keep our children fed.
Fill our cups then fill them up again tonight.
Wrap us up & warm us through,
Tucked away beneath sturdy roofs.
Let us slumber, safe from danger’s view this time.
Or maybe not, not today, maybe You’ll provide in other ways.
And if that’s the case, we’ll give thanks to You with gratitude.
A lesson learned: to hunger after You,
That a starry sky offers a better view if no roof is overhead.
And if we never taste that bread.
Oh, the differences that often are between
Everything we want and what we really need.
So grant us peace, Jesus grant us peace.
Move our hearts to hear a single beat
Between alibis and enemies tonight.
Or maybe not, not today.
Peace might be a million miles away. And if that’s the case,
We’ll give thanks to You with gratitude,
For lessons learned in how to trust in You.
We are blessed beyond what we could ever dream
In abundance or in need.
And if You never grant us peace,
But, Jesus, would you please?
As I share life with these friends, I keep being drawn to a message Jesus first told thousands of years ago. Seated on a mountainside, he talked about a kingdom where blessings lie in what we so often struggle to avoid. He said, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of God.” In The Jesus I Never Knew, Philip Yancey writes: “With no where else to turn, the desperate just may turn to Jesus, the only one who can offer the deliverance they long for. Jesus really believed that a person who is poor in spirit, or mourning, or persecuted, or hungry & thirsty for righteousness has a peculiar “advantage” over the rest of us. Maybe, just maybe, the desperate person will cry out to God for help. If so, that person truly is blessed.” Yancey quoted a list of “advantages” to being poor written by Monica Hellwig. These describe so much of what I witness on a daily basis in the lives of the people I serve with:
1. The poor know they are in urgent need of redemption.
2. The poor know not only their dependence on God & on powerful people but also their interdependence with one another.
3. The poor rest their security not on things but on people.
4. The poor have no exaggerated sense of their own importance, and no exaggerated sense of privacy.
5. The poor expect little from competition & much from cooperation.
6. The poor can distinguish between necessities & luxuries.
7. The poor can wait, because they have acquired a kind of dogged patience born of acknowledged dependence.
8. The fears of the poor are more realistic & less exaggerated, because they already know that one can survive great suffering & want.
9. When the poor have the Gospel preached to them, it sounds like good news & not a threat or scolding.
10. The poor can respond to the call of the Gospel with a certain abandonment & totality because they have so little to lose & are ready for anything.
In a way that baffles the standards of this world, I am learning & experiencing that God’s kingdom is offered & received by those who recognize their need for it. Just this past week, I met a lady named Teresa whose life demonstrates a dependence upon God. Her story continues to move & challenge me to live out the love of Christ.
Like so many others in the community, Teresa’s life situation is extremely difficult. Her husband, an alcoholic, abandoned her to raise their five children alone. She lives in a mud hut and survives through her small business of cooking & selling food to workers in the community. As if her life were not already full of struggles, one month ago Teresa took in a 5 month old little girl named Ivon. Ivon’s mother died in May. Her father was leaving Ivon in the house alone from morning until night while he was away drinking. Upon learning of the neglect & abuse that was occurring, Teresa went to Ivon’s father & asked him to allow her to take the baby. When asked why she decided to care for the baby, her only response was: “I felt sympathy towards her.”
Teresa’s generosity, in the midst of her poverty, humbles & challenges me. She has taken the message of 1 John 3:16-18, as it was intended, literally. It says, “This is how we know what love is: Jesus gave his life for us. We too, then, ought to give our lives for our brothers. But whoever has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how can the love of Christ abide in him? My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in action and in truth.” Since my visit, the sacrificial love of Teresa & the face of this beautiful child have not escaped my mind.
Let me close by sharing lyrics that speak of living with gratitude in the midst of unfulfilled hopes. This is the prayer of my friends & has become the desire of my heart. As Jesus said, the kingdom belongs to such as these.
Gratitude
By Nichole Nordeman
Send some rain, would you send some rain?
Cause the earth is dry & needs to drink again
And the sun is high and we are sinking in the shade.
Would you send a cloud, thunder long & loud,
Let the sky grow black & send some mercy down?
Surely you can see we are thirsty & afraid.
But maybe not, not today, maybe you’ll provide in other ways
And if that’s the case, we’ll give thanks to You with gratitude
For lessons learned in how to thirst for You;
How to bless the very sun that warms our face
If you never send us rain.
Daily bread, give us daily bread.
Bless our bodies; keep our children fed.
Fill our cups then fill them up again tonight.
Wrap us up & warm us through,
Tucked away beneath sturdy roofs.
Let us slumber, safe from danger’s view this time.
Or maybe not, not today, maybe You’ll provide in other ways.
And if that’s the case, we’ll give thanks to You with gratitude.
A lesson learned: to hunger after You,
That a starry sky offers a better view if no roof is overhead.
And if we never taste that bread.
Oh, the differences that often are between
Everything we want and what we really need.
So grant us peace, Jesus grant us peace.
Move our hearts to hear a single beat
Between alibis and enemies tonight.
Or maybe not, not today.
Peace might be a million miles away. And if that’s the case,
We’ll give thanks to You with gratitude,
For lessons learned in how to trust in You.
We are blessed beyond what we could ever dream
In abundance or in need.
And if You never grant us peace,
But, Jesus, would you please?
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
Unexpected Suprises
This evening I was taking a walk & was overwhelmed by the beauty of this place. As the rains have come, the landscape is transforming. Everything is green, the river is rising & the corn is covering the country side. As I was walking & thanking God for His provision, I was greeted by two little kids. When I say “greeted”, I mean they ran at full speed with muddied, bare-feet & outstretched arms to hug me. I should probably mention I’ve never met these children before. I’m guessing the rule of not talking to strangers does not apply here. Needless to say, their hunger for attention & uninhibited embrace grabbed my heart. God used those two precious children to remind me of His great love & why it is that I am here.
Over the past months, there have been many moments filled with reminders just like this one. Without a doubt, this is a journey of trust filled with unexpected surprises. There are many obstacles & challenges along the way, but there is also an overwhelming sense of the favor of God. I’m experiencing the truth that indeed “eye has not seen, nor ear heard. Nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him.” (1 Corinthians 2:9). In reflecting upon how this verse defines so much of my life these days, I wrote these words.
As the plans I’ve made are all stripped away,
I find what I’ve been searching for.
The longings within my heart-
Are clearer than ever before.
As I sit within the meadows,
And I dance through the streams.
With Your Presence forevermore,
I’ll live what I didn’t dare to dream.
What my ears have not heard.
What my eyes have yet to see.
What my mind could not comprehend.
You’ve already prepared for me.
Community Health Projects…
There are several exciting projects currently occurring within the ELI Health Ministry. For me, it is really a blessing to watch this community catch a vision to implement practices that promote better health for themselves & their families as well as to care for those who are sick within the village. I want to share about 3 projects that are taking place, and I ask you to join me in praying that God will use these efforts & bring new ideas for further development.
Traditional Birth Attendant (TBA) Training.
As I shared within a previous newsletter, it is estimated that at least 80% of births, within the village of Kipkaren, are conducted in homes by untrained traditional birth attendants (TBAs). TBAs are women who have learned delivery methods through the experience of older women. Because there is a greater risk for the health of both mother & child in delivering at home, the need to empower TBAs with more knowledge was identified.
In 2004, 35 TBAs successfully completed a 16-week TBA training taught by the ELI Health Clinic staff. In March, I had the privilege of partnering with one of these TBAs in a home delivery, and I tell you it really was a blessing to witness the combination of her years of extensive experience & newly gained knowledge put into practice.
In June, we are beginning our second 16- week training for another group of TBAs within Kipkaren as well as a training in a neighboring community. The course will include topics such as hygiene, HIV/AIDS, delivery complications, when to refer the expectant mother to the clinic, mother & child nutrition, family planning, and many others. At the end of the training, there will be a final exam. Because many of these women have not have the opportunity to go to school and do not read or write, it will be their first exam and will be conducted orally. For those who successfully complete the course, there will be a graduation in which each TBA will receive a certificate and a metal box filled with basic supplies to carry with them when conducting deliveries.
Home-Based Care (HBC) Caregiver Training. We have just completed an 8-week training for people to learn more about HIV/AIDS and how to provide home-based care for those who are sick within the community. It was exciting to watch the HBC committee teach the course with so much passion as well as the community members applying themselves to learn with so much dedication. In addition to learning within the classroom, the community members went into the homes of the sick & had an opportunity to implement “hands on” what they had learned. There are 31 who will graduate from the course this coming Saturday. In the weeks & months ahead, the HBC committee will be partnering with those newly trained caregivers to mobilize care for the ever growing need within Kipkaren & the surrounding villages.
In 2 weeks, there will be another caregiver training for 25 people, from churches in the surrounding areas, to come for a 3-day intensive course. Please pray that God will use these trainings to enable those trained to reach out to their neighbors & family members with the love of Christ.
Malaria Prevention Project. During the rainy season, malaria is a huge problem within this area. In 2004, the ELI Health Clinic treated 786 adults & children with malaria. Even this past week, there have been 2 small children who have died while under treatment and another hospitalized due to malaria. Recently we have been able to purchase mosquito nets, at a dramatically discounted rate, to distribute them throughout the community.
Please pray that God will bring new ideas to break the cycle of malaria as it causes so much suffering within this community.
Blessings to you…Thank you for your continued prayers & support. Know that they are needed & appreciated so very much.
Friday, April 15, 2005
"Together We Are Coming Against AIDS"
April 15, 2005 is a day that will not be soon forgotten in the village of Kipkaren as hundreds to thousands of men, women & children gathered together in a field for an HIV/AIDS Awareness Campaign. The event began in the morning and lasted until late in the night and was evidence that God can & is truly replacing the fears surrounding HIV/AIDS with a new sense of hope within this community. The day’s theme was “Together we are Coming Against AIDS”; and throughout the day, those theme words were repeated in Swahili, “pamoja tunapinga ukimwi”, as people joined & lifted their hands together.
The day was filled with many activities- all with this underlying message: HIV/AIDS has & continues to steal to many lives, and it is past time for the community to join together & fight it. It is time to fight the stigma surrounding AIDS that alienates people. It is time to speak the truth about the realities of HIV. It is time to make wise choices that prevent the transmission of HIV. And for those already HIV positive, it is time to face the fear of going to be tested in order to gain the chance for treatment.
The activities of the day included the finals of a local tournament. It was amazing to watch these young men from surrounding villages come & play. There were no lines to mark the field, no scoreboard to keep the marks, and some even played barefoot; but it was very competitive and a lot of fun for the many who watched as well as for those who played.
In the afternoon, HIV testing & counselling was offered and dramas & songs by Kipkaren’s Home-Based Care caregivers were performed. As I watched men & women share openly & with passion about the topic of
AIDS, I knew it was a pivitol day in the life of the community as the vision for fighting against the spread of HIV & caring for those already infected was, by at least a few, captured.
One of the highlights of the day was witnessing 5 people from the surrounding area stand before the community & share that they were HIV positive. As I listened to one of the patient’s within our Home-Based Care share about his status & his life, I was reminded of sitting in his home just a few short months ago. He was so very sick & did not think he would live to see the new year. But on this day, as he shared there was a new found hope. He is currently taking HIV medications & growing stronger with each day. Upon visiting him, he often reminds me, “Mungu anaweza” which means God is able. As he stood before the people, he encouraged them to go for HIV testing & to face their fears. His testimony of what God is doing in his life was truly a miracle to experience.
The remarkable day was closed by an amazing concert by a band from Nairobi called “The Village”. Through music, this group of gifted Christian musicians powerfully proclaimed a message about the love of Christ and Kenya’s need to fight against HIV/AIDS. It was a night filled with singing & dancing as well as a time where people fell to their knees & asked God to bring healing to their land.
In a village filled with many struggles, I am grateful for the victories, great & small, that are being won. I am grateful for the relationships that are being made & the lives that are being empowered through the work being done. I am grateful that God has allowed me to be a part in what He is wanting to do within this community. And I am grateful for the ways God has used you, my family & friends, again & again to reveal His love & faithfulness. Your continued prayers & support enable me to live & work here in Kipkaren & bless my life more than I could ever express. So thank you.
Thursday, February 10, 2005
The Battle Is Not My Own
I no longer wonder what it felt like for David to come against Goliath. I, too an unlikely choice, have been asked and have committed to fight a battle that is much bigger than myself. I must confess it seems absurd to throw the few small stones I’ve been given at this giant killing Africa; but then again, I need not forget that the battle is not my own. The longer I remain in this little village, the more God is awakening me to the reality of how big an enemy AIDS really is. The love of God continues to compel me to follow the model of Jesus Christ “who walked thousands of kilometers, held hundreds of hands crushed by calamity, ate with prostitutes & thieves, and marched into big churches to tell the religious leaders that the kingdom of God was upon them- outside in the community where the blind and lepers lay”.
The nature of HIV is to hide itself within an individual’s body as well as a community & continent until it has spread to unfathomable proportions. By the time it shows its indiscriminant and ugly face, life is quickly stolen striking a fear so deep within those left behind. The fear factor, associated with AIDS, has caused even the word Ukimwi (Swahili for AIDS) to rarely be mentioned; instead, we talk about “the sickness”. This silence and refusal to recognize the reality of HIV/AIDS continues to nourish its spread in Africa.
Two weeks ago, as I sat with yet another family experiencing the devastation of AIDS, my heart was broken again. The family is comprised of a man in his forties who is struggling to hold onto life, two wives already infected, and a beautiful three month old baby named Brian whose status is yet to be discovered. On that day, I wasn’t alright with simply sitting beside them as they die. I desired for there to be hope restored. I told the family that I had heard about a clinic in the neighboring town of Turbo offering services to HIV patients on Friday’s. I had no idea what to expect, but we decided it was worth a try.
Friday morning, I woke up early and was encouraged as I read in the Psalms that God does not forget the cries of the humble (9:12). I needed to be reminded of that. Upon arriving to the Turbo clinic, an older gentleman from the States welcomed me graciously and introduced himself as Dr. Joe, the physician in charge of the clinic. As I stood in an office full of antiretrovirals and other medications, he asked what I thought. Tears streamed down my face as I told him, "I sit with people every day as they struggle to live & it's horrible." As the day continued, it was very evident that God was opening doors for us to partner together to care for & treat AIDS patients.
Through grants & other funding sources, Dr. Joe has been able to open multiple clinics & give free testing & treatment to thousands of HIV patients throughout Kenya. The services offered include medical treatment with access to HIV medications, laboratory services, nutritional support & counseling, and other social supports. That day, I returned to the village in awe of the possibilities for providing care that had been revealed.
Since my first visit to the Turbo clinic two weeks ago, we have begun a HIV/AIDS Awareness Counsel that is made up of 8 dynamic people from Kipkaren who are passionate about caring for the needs of those infected & affected within this community. With a renewed sense of hope, we are looking for ways to battle the fears associated with HIV/AIDS.
This week, HIV testing & counseling has been started within the village. Even this morning, I sat with a young man who came requesting to be tested. He was obviously frightened by what the results would be; when the test results were negative, he pulled condoms out of his pocket and shared that he needed to throw them away & begin to live in a way he knew Jesus had called him to. I spoke frankly with him & told him that he was responsible to make choices that would protect his family & himself from HIV and encouraged him to find someone he could talk with to hold him accountable for his actions. As we shared, I felt led to pray for him. His reply was that we needed to get on our knees. In my little hut, we asked God to lead, to provide strength in weakness, & thanked Him for grace and protection. It was an amazing moment of truth.
For those that test positive, access to medical treatment with Dr. Joe is offered & coordinated for any who are willing to go. We’re finding home based care to be a valuable way to monitor medication compliance in between visits as well as to follow up on other needs within the family. Pastoral support and counseling are also available to encourage the patient & family.
Needless to say, there are many exciting things happening within the health ministry of ELI these days. I am seeing visions become realities & watching God grant dreams greater than I had dared to dream. I covet your prayers for continued strength & wisdom as I continue to fight this battle & learn to love. God is at work, and I want to join Him
Monday, January 17, 2005
What We Have Not Yet Seen
"For our present troubles are quite small and won't last very long. Yet they produce for us an immeasurably great glory that will last forever! So we don't look at the troubles we can see right now; rather, we look forward to what we have not yet seen. For the troubles we see will soon be over, but the joys to come will last forever” (2 Corinthians 4:17-18). In a much needed email, I received these verses this past week and was gratefully reminded how temporary the pains of this world, Kipkaren village, and my own life really are. This is not to deny the reality of the present suffering; on a daily basis, I see that it is all too real. There is hunger, sickness, and struggles of many kinds that surround. But in the midst of pain, it is easy to lose heart and forget that the burdens will soon be over and replaced by unending joy. So as I write this, I find myself thankful that God’s heart is for the broken & oppressed but also hope-filled that someday the suffering will altogether end.
Childbirth is a perfect analogy of this process of struggle & pain preceding joy. Jesus described it as this: “A woman, when she is in labor, has sorrow because her hour of suffering has come; but as soon as she gives birth to the child, she no longer remembers the anguish for she is filled with joy that her baby has been born into the world” (John 16:21). I experienced this very thing today. On the floor of a mud hut, I sat with a friend as she labored for an intense 16 hours. There were no medications to numb her pain; and with great courage, she labored. Without immediate relief, she struggled & cried out to God. After many hours, she asked: “will this baby ever come?” Although I wondered the same thing, I encouraged her that the painful process would soon end and would be worth it. When the long awaited moment arrived, a greater joy indeed replaced her pain. There was a little baby boy who filled her arms. As I delivered the baby & he drew his first breath, I was reminded of the incredible miracle & gift life truly is. Although it’s indescribable, I witnessed this mystery that “pleasure, coming after the pain, absorbs it” (Yancey).
For the present time, within each of us, there will remain unfulfilled desires and a longing for what is broken to be restored. But I am learning that, in the midst of pain, God is still deserving of my praise. There are lyrics to a song entitled “When the Tears Fall” that express what it is that I am trying to share. They say:
“I’ve had questions without answers. I’ve known sorrow, I have known pain. But there’s one thing, I will cling to: You are faithful. Jesus, You’re true. When hope is lost, I’ll call you Savior. When pain surrounds, I’ll call you healer. When silence falls, you’ll be the song within my heart. In the long hour of my sorrow. Through the darkest night of my soul, You surround me and sustain me. My defender, forevermore. I will praise you, I will praise you. When the tears fall, still I will sing to you. I will praise you, Jesus praise you. Through the suffering, still I will sing”. – Tim Hughes
More to tell…
Over the past months, I have shared stories about various aspects of ELI’s health ministry taking place within the community and wanted to give you the latest updates.
Orphange: There are now 90 children living in the ELI Children’s Home. They are doing very well as they remain in an environment with structure & love. Please continue to pray for the parents, teachers, and all of the other workers who have full-time jobs investing in these little ones.
Community Health Program: A major target of ELI’s efforts are geared towards the prevention of disease. It is clear that preventing is always better than treating a disease; and within the clinic, our health team meets weekly to develop & implement strategies for the prevention of illness within our community. Some of our efforts are currently targeting the following areas:
Immunization of infants & children- Easily preventable childhood illnesses such as measles, mumps & polio continue to seen due to the lack of immunizations. Because of this identified need, immunizations and monitoring the growth & development of infants and children are now available to the community on a bi-weekly basis.
Solar water purification pilot project- Water borne illnesses are a leading cause of illness and even death within the region. A pilot project has been launched targeting 10 families within the community utilizing 1 liter plastic bottles. The bottles are filled with water & left in the sun for 6 hours. The UV rays from the sun kill the disease causing organisms & offer hope of reducing illnesses related to dirty water. With time, we plan for this strategy to be introduced into the larger community.
Malaria Prevention- Within tropical & sub-tropical regions throughout the world, malaria causes more than 300 million acute illnesses & at least 1 million deaths annually (WHO, 2004). The World Health Organization reports that malaria kills an African child every 30 seconds. In 2004, the ELI Health Ministry treated 786 adults & children with malaria. Ongoing education is being offered in ways to prevent the transmission of malaria. Also, we are pushing to sell mosquito nets treated with insecticide at discounted rates to the community.
Traditional Birth Attendants (TBA’s)- Within the Kipkaren community, we estimate that at least 80% of births in this community are conducted in homes by untrained traditional birth attendants (TBAs). TBAs are women who have learned delivery methods through the experience of older women. Because there is a greater risk for the health of both mother & child in delivering at home, the need to empower TBAs with more knowledge was identified. A 16 week TBA training was taught by the clinic staff with 35 women successfully completing the course in December 2004. In June of 2005, another 16 week training will be conducted for other TBA’s within the community as well as continued follow up for those previously trained.
Home-Based Care (HBC)- As reported within my last update, the HBC program continues to grow quickly and in incredible ways. Currently, there is HIV testing & counseling available within Kipkaren, HIV medications & treatment within the neighboring town of Turbo, & routine follow-up home visits made by the members of our HIV/AIDS Awareness Committee. We are also regularly visiting orphans & widows that fill our community to encourage and assist them where possible. This week, we have begun a 6 week training for caregivers on home-based care. It was exciting as 27 men & women came for the first session. I truly believe this will be a great means of allowing members of the community to become aware of the realities of HIV/AIDS that will enable them to reach out to their neighbors & family members with the love of Christ.
Thank you again for your continued prayers, love & support. They allow and enable me to do what I love and have been called to do. I pray that this update has been a reflection of what is occurring within my heart as well as the greater ministry in which I serve and will be an encouragement & blessing to you.
Tuesday, December 28, 2004
Kenyan Christmas
The Story Continues...
Over the months, bit by bit I have been telling of the vision that God has placed within my heart to visit & care for the sick within their homes. This time, I want to continue, in that, by telling you the story of a man named Timone. If I were to describe what I feel most called to and passionate about, Timone’s situation is it.
He is an educated man who was once a husband, father, & successful businessman. Now, in his mid-thirties, his life has little remnants of what used to be. The consequences of HIV/AIDS have left his physical body wasted, filled with pain, and unable to eat or control even his most basic body functions. Because of neurological impairment, he has significant right sided weakness & his speech is very limited. But it only takes one look into his eyes to understand, at least in part, the story he is unable to speak. Abandoned by his family, he can be found sitting alone within his little hut on any given day. He’s tired & alone. Upon our initial visits, the clinic staff & I found Timone hungry & dirty. We began visiting Timone regularly in order to build a relationship & to care for the most basic needs of this broken man. We started with the obvious needs by cooking foods (he could actually eat) and assisting him with bathing, laundry, & other household chores.
As time has passed, I’ve learned that Timone & I share a love for music And so we sing. In actuality, he hums as I attempt to accompany him in my broken Swahili or Kalenjiin; nonetheless, his face lights up leaving both of our eyes filled with tears. Translated from Kalenjiin, the words of his favorite song say: “ Let the hand of the Lord take care of me until I go home.”
Although this may sound strange, sitting with Timone is often the closest I feel to Jesus. In Matthew 25, Jesus tells us a story in which he says: “I was hungry and you fed me, thirsty and you gave me a drink; I was sick and you took care of me”... When asked, “when did this happen?”, Jesus simply replied: “whenever you did it unto the least of these, you did it to me”. Just prior to my coming to Kenya, I read a quote by Mother Teresa in which she said: “Each AIDS victim is Jesus in a distressing disguise”. Believing this is what God was calling me to do, I wrote a song in reflection of these words. The lyrics read:
See You…
Little hands- tear stained eyes.
Wasted bodies. Endless cries.
In a world, so hard to understand-
Jesus, I see it’s your hands.
Broken hearts- Tired of the fight.
Afraid & alone with death in sight.
In their world, so hard to understand-
Jesus, I see it’s your hands,
It’s your feet, & your heart.
And I want to touch you &
Serve you all of my days.
I love you, because you first loved me.
Jesus, help me to see that when I look deeper-
It is you who is looking back at me.
Jesus, help me to see- It’s you.
Even though it’s just a glimpse, I am getting see Jesus; and I must tell you, it is in what might seem to be the most unlikely of places.
A Kenyan Christmas...
As I wrote in my last update, I knew that Christmas would be a different experience this year. I desired for it to be different, and it was. It was a simple season but rich with precious moments and priceless gifts…
Much of the week proceeding Christmas, I spent in Ilula at the children’s home where there are currently 85 children living. It was an amazing blessing as my sister’s company sent 7 large packages full of clothes, toys, Christmas decorations & toiletry items for the kids. Tears filled my eyes as I opened the boxes- most of these kids have never had a single toy. Over the past months, they have come one by one to this home barefoot with only the clothes on their backs. Their eyes wideopen and wondering where life was taking them next. One of the parents, upon seeing the boxes, said: "I have no words to say- surely God is good." And I wish there was a way to truly capture the smiles upon each child’s face as they received their gifts- it is a moment I am not soon to forget.
I also had the opportunity to take food and supplies to Timone. I was surprised, upon arriving to his home, to find his 5 year old son had come to visit his dad for a few weeks over the Christmas holiday. Little Kipchumba’s presence had brought a smile that was rare to see upon Timone’s face. Again, I was grateful for the good gifts that only God could give.
Last, but definitely not least, I had the privelege to take food & supplies to the home of Edwin. He is the 12 year old boy in late stage heart failure that I wrote about a few months ago. Thank you for your continued prayers for he and his family. He continues on medications to help filter out the excess fluid that fills his abdomen and is surrounding his heart, and his abdomen is at least half the size it was when I met him. I walked up to where his family lives & told his mom & brother that there were things for them in the car. The next thing I know- Edwin is running down the hill to the car with this huge smile upon his face. It was an incredible miracle to watch. On Christmas morning, I was amazed when Edwin & 2 of his sisters walked over 2 miles to the training center. Upon arriving, Edwin explained that they had come to go to the Christmas service at church. Again, my heart was overwhelmed by the gifts God was allowing us to receive & experience.
There are not enough words to express the gratefulness I feel within my heart for the continued prayers and generous support I’ve received throughout the past year. But I thank you & pray the blessings of God would fill your lives throughout the coming new year.
Over the months, bit by bit I have been telling of the vision that God has placed within my heart to visit & care for the sick within their homes. This time, I want to continue, in that, by telling you the story of a man named Timone. If I were to describe what I feel most called to and passionate about, Timone’s situation is it.
He is an educated man who was once a husband, father, & successful businessman. Now, in his mid-thirties, his life has little remnants of what used to be. The consequences of HIV/AIDS have left his physical body wasted, filled with pain, and unable to eat or control even his most basic body functions. Because of neurological impairment, he has significant right sided weakness & his speech is very limited. But it only takes one look into his eyes to understand, at least in part, the story he is unable to speak. Abandoned by his family, he can be found sitting alone within his little hut on any given day. He’s tired & alone. Upon our initial visits, the clinic staff & I found Timone hungry & dirty. We began visiting Timone regularly in order to build a relationship & to care for the most basic needs of this broken man. We started with the obvious needs by cooking foods (he could actually eat) and assisting him with bathing, laundry, & other household chores.
As time has passed, I’ve learned that Timone & I share a love for music And so we sing. In actuality, he hums as I attempt to accompany him in my broken Swahili or Kalenjiin; nonetheless, his face lights up leaving both of our eyes filled with tears. Translated from Kalenjiin, the words of his favorite song say: “ Let the hand of the Lord take care of me until I go home.”
Although this may sound strange, sitting with Timone is often the closest I feel to Jesus. In Matthew 25, Jesus tells us a story in which he says: “I was hungry and you fed me, thirsty and you gave me a drink; I was sick and you took care of me”... When asked, “when did this happen?”, Jesus simply replied: “whenever you did it unto the least of these, you did it to me”. Just prior to my coming to Kenya, I read a quote by Mother Teresa in which she said: “Each AIDS victim is Jesus in a distressing disguise”. Believing this is what God was calling me to do, I wrote a song in reflection of these words. The lyrics read:
See You…
Little hands- tear stained eyes.
Wasted bodies. Endless cries.
In a world, so hard to understand-
Jesus, I see it’s your hands.
Broken hearts- Tired of the fight.
Afraid & alone with death in sight.
In their world, so hard to understand-
Jesus, I see it’s your hands,
It’s your feet, & your heart.
And I want to touch you &
Serve you all of my days.
I love you, because you first loved me.
Jesus, help me to see that when I look deeper-
It is you who is looking back at me.
Jesus, help me to see- It’s you.
Even though it’s just a glimpse, I am getting see Jesus; and I must tell you, it is in what might seem to be the most unlikely of places.
A Kenyan Christmas...
As I wrote in my last update, I knew that Christmas would be a different experience this year. I desired for it to be different, and it was. It was a simple season but rich with precious moments and priceless gifts…
Much of the week proceeding Christmas, I spent in Ilula at the children’s home where there are currently 85 children living. It was an amazing blessing as my sister’s company sent 7 large packages full of clothes, toys, Christmas decorations & toiletry items for the kids. Tears filled my eyes as I opened the boxes- most of these kids have never had a single toy. Over the past months, they have come one by one to this home barefoot with only the clothes on their backs. Their eyes wideopen and wondering where life was taking them next. One of the parents, upon seeing the boxes, said: "I have no words to say- surely God is good." And I wish there was a way to truly capture the smiles upon each child’s face as they received their gifts- it is a moment I am not soon to forget.
I also had the opportunity to take food and supplies to Timone. I was surprised, upon arriving to his home, to find his 5 year old son had come to visit his dad for a few weeks over the Christmas holiday. Little Kipchumba’s presence had brought a smile that was rare to see upon Timone’s face. Again, I was grateful for the good gifts that only God could give.
Last, but definitely not least, I had the privelege to take food & supplies to the home of Edwin. He is the 12 year old boy in late stage heart failure that I wrote about a few months ago. Thank you for your continued prayers for he and his family. He continues on medications to help filter out the excess fluid that fills his abdomen and is surrounding his heart, and his abdomen is at least half the size it was when I met him. I walked up to where his family lives & told his mom & brother that there were things for them in the car. The next thing I know- Edwin is running down the hill to the car with this huge smile upon his face. It was an incredible miracle to watch. On Christmas morning, I was amazed when Edwin & 2 of his sisters walked over 2 miles to the training center. Upon arriving, Edwin explained that they had come to go to the Christmas service at church. Again, my heart was overwhelmed by the gifts God was allowing us to receive & experience.
There are not enough words to express the gratefulness I feel within my heart for the continued prayers and generous support I’ve received throughout the past year. But I thank you & pray the blessings of God would fill your lives throughout the coming new year.
Wednesday, December 01, 2004
Christmas at the Manger
It’s hard to believe Christmas season has come… To say the least, it has a very different feeling this year. In my little village, we don’t experience the hustle & bustle of shopping, there are no holiday parties to attend, no hopes for a white Christmas, and no trees to decorate or Santa Claus to visit in the mall. Life feels somehow the same as every other day; and yet, there is a clear understanding that there is reason to celebrate.
This season I’ve been reminded again of my first trip to Kenya. I’ll never forget wallking down that dirt path only to find a young pregnant lady named Christine in labor and ready to deliver. She had walked several miles, having heard there was a nurse in the village, and I was the one she had found. I remember thinking, “this is no place or way for a baby to be born”; and yet, that is exactly what was about to happen. Just down the path, there was a small mud hut that became a delivery room. Little Joshua was born on a dirty floor made of cow dung without complication, and God’s peace and presence filled that place in a way I had never experienced before. I was amazed to later learn that the people who were gracious enough to open their home were named Mary & Joseph. After that day, the humble birth of Jesus took on a whole new meaning to me.
Over the past few weeks, I have been blessed with a little taste of home as my parents and a team from their church in Redding, California have come to visit Kip Karen. Without doubt, one of the highlights of their trip was the night we celebrated Christmas together. Yes, it was a bit early as it proceeded December 25 by a few weeks; nonetheless, an unforgettable night. With great love & care, the team had brought presents for each member of the family I live with and myself. After opening my presents, I was thankful for the generosity of gifts given; but in my spirit, I needed something more. I desired what “things” could not provide me.
As we prepared to continue with the party, I explained to the team: “to truly celebrate, there’s not enough room in this inn”. They didn’t really understand what was about to take place; but through the rainy night, we made our way to the stables & simply stood at the manger. Among the animals, we read the Christmas story with a greater understanding of what actually took place that first Christmas. It was not glamorous and the most unlikely place for the Saviour of the world to be born; and yet, it was the way he chose to come and be among us. Tears streamed down my face as the words of the old Christmas carol kept running through my head: “Away in a manger, no crib for a bed. The little, Lord Jesus laid down his sweet head. The stars in the sky looked down where he lay. The little, Lord Jesus asleep on the hay.”
I wondered, what kind of love would allow Jesus to come to the world in this way? I still wonder… I do pray that your Christmas will be blessed and filled with great joy. And just maybe, through the busyness of the season, you can find your way back to the manger. It is an incredible place to go- it’s where God chose to come.
Sunday, October 31, 2004
5 Loaves & 2 Fish
Coming home.
I send greetings from my new home in the village of Kipkaren. I am grateful that God has called me to come and live this season of life in this place. Throughout the community, I have been welcomed with rich hospitality by both old and new friends. One of the first people to greet me was a little 4 year old boy named Daudi, a child I delivered my first trip to Kenya. It’s hard to describe the feelings I felt in seeing this child again, but it was definitely a moment I was reminded of the faithfulness of God.
I wish each of you could also experience the view from the front door of my hut which overlooks the Kipkaren River. It is truly a beautiful sight and peace-filled place.
Grace to care.
Within days of arriving to the village, I met a 12 year old boy named Edwin. His story and life have touched my heart deeply. I ask that you pray for him and his family as their lives are filled with great challenges. I met Edwin while he was in a local hospital in the town of Eldoret. Although his smile would tell otherwise, his grossly distended abdomen revealed that he was gravely sick. His cardiac workup confirmed that he is in late stage heart failure with no treatment options available. He was sent home and is currently on medication to help filter out the excess fluid that fills his abdomen and is surrounding his heart. The reality of his situation allowed me to realize again the need for home-based care. Allison Tjaden, my dear friend and co-worker with ELI, and I have begun to visit Edwin & his family about once a week. I tell you, some of my favorite moments have been spent simply sitting under a tree with this little boy & his family. We shell the recently harvested maize, listen to Edwin’s radio, and attempt to learn the Kalenjiin language. Basic physical assessments are done and we pray together. In the midst of the challenges, I am learning that joy is found in meeting people simply where they are. I ask you to join me in praying for the compassion and grace to care for this family in a way that will allow them to experience the love of God.
Orphanage update.
Since my last update, the number of children living at the children’s home has grown to 50. These little ones are so full of life and doing very well. Please continue to pray for the entire children’s home staff and these precious children.
Need realized.
In my last update, I reported that I would be attending a training on the implementation of home-based care. It was timely that the day before I was scheduled to go I attended the funeral of a 30 year old man named Amos. I know little about his life; but his death, due to AIDS, allowed me to realize again the deep need that exists within this community. These words, written within my journal, were reflections of a hard day but also represent the prayers of my heart: “I need to surrender these heavy burdens that accompany this day. Passions that are deep within me are now developing into realities; and yet, they are harsh and way bigger than myself. My heart was grieved today over Amos’ lost life and also what he left behind. Two small boys watched as their father was lowered into the ground. A widow wept. A mother sat in shock and silence as her second child, in two months, was buried. A community gathered and supported each other, but an unspoken reality also rang crystal clear. Another life was stolen and shortened by AIDS. Today, AIDS was not about statistics. It was not about research or academic pursuit. Today, there were two little boys, a widow, and grieving parents who buried a man they loved. There is a monster in this land; and there are challenges, that apart from God, are impossible. This is not about programs or my plans, but I pray that the love of God can be implemented into action.”
The next morning, I traveled with several others from the clinic staff to be trained on practical ways to implement holistic care within homes using local resources. The training was led by a Kenyan lady who has been running a home-based care program for HIV/AIDS patients in a slum area outside of Nairobi. The stories she shared, from her experiences, were inspiring to say the least. I t was a great two days of learning and dreaming, and I am excited to see how God is going to use these ideas and knowledge learned to care for the sick within the community of Kipkaren. The overwhelming need that fills this place reminds me of the story found in Matthew 14:15-21. Jesus, recognizing the hungry people, had compassion on them and told the disciples: “They don’t need to go away. You give them something to eat.” The resources they had were a mere five loaves of bread & two fish; but when surrendered to Jesus, it met the needs of a multitude. I,too, find myself in the midst of a multitude with great needs and hear Jesus reminding me: “They don’t need to go away. You give them something to eat.” So, I’ll offer the five loaves of bread and two fish and trust Jesus to multiply it. Thank you for your continued prayers and support.
I send greetings from my new home in the village of Kipkaren. I am grateful that God has called me to come and live this season of life in this place. Throughout the community, I have been welcomed with rich hospitality by both old and new friends. One of the first people to greet me was a little 4 year old boy named Daudi, a child I delivered my first trip to Kenya. It’s hard to describe the feelings I felt in seeing this child again, but it was definitely a moment I was reminded of the faithfulness of God.
I wish each of you could also experience the view from the front door of my hut which overlooks the Kipkaren River. It is truly a beautiful sight and peace-filled place.
Grace to care.
Within days of arriving to the village, I met a 12 year old boy named Edwin. His story and life have touched my heart deeply. I ask that you pray for him and his family as their lives are filled with great challenges. I met Edwin while he was in a local hospital in the town of Eldoret. Although his smile would tell otherwise, his grossly distended abdomen revealed that he was gravely sick. His cardiac workup confirmed that he is in late stage heart failure with no treatment options available. He was sent home and is currently on medication to help filter out the excess fluid that fills his abdomen and is surrounding his heart. The reality of his situation allowed me to realize again the need for home-based care. Allison Tjaden, my dear friend and co-worker with ELI, and I have begun to visit Edwin & his family about once a week. I tell you, some of my favorite moments have been spent simply sitting under a tree with this little boy & his family. We shell the recently harvested maize, listen to Edwin’s radio, and attempt to learn the Kalenjiin language. Basic physical assessments are done and we pray together. In the midst of the challenges, I am learning that joy is found in meeting people simply where they are. I ask you to join me in praying for the compassion and grace to care for this family in a way that will allow them to experience the love of God.
Orphanage update.
Since my last update, the number of children living at the children’s home has grown to 50. These little ones are so full of life and doing very well. Please continue to pray for the entire children’s home staff and these precious children.
Need realized.
In my last update, I reported that I would be attending a training on the implementation of home-based care. It was timely that the day before I was scheduled to go I attended the funeral of a 30 year old man named Amos. I know little about his life; but his death, due to AIDS, allowed me to realize again the deep need that exists within this community. These words, written within my journal, were reflections of a hard day but also represent the prayers of my heart: “I need to surrender these heavy burdens that accompany this day. Passions that are deep within me are now developing into realities; and yet, they are harsh and way bigger than myself. My heart was grieved today over Amos’ lost life and also what he left behind. Two small boys watched as their father was lowered into the ground. A widow wept. A mother sat in shock and silence as her second child, in two months, was buried. A community gathered and supported each other, but an unspoken reality also rang crystal clear. Another life was stolen and shortened by AIDS. Today, AIDS was not about statistics. It was not about research or academic pursuit. Today, there were two little boys, a widow, and grieving parents who buried a man they loved. There is a monster in this land; and there are challenges, that apart from God, are impossible. This is not about programs or my plans, but I pray that the love of God can be implemented into action.”
The next morning, I traveled with several others from the clinic staff to be trained on practical ways to implement holistic care within homes using local resources. The training was led by a Kenyan lady who has been running a home-based care program for HIV/AIDS patients in a slum area outside of Nairobi. The stories she shared, from her experiences, were inspiring to say the least. I t was a great two days of learning and dreaming, and I am excited to see how God is going to use these ideas and knowledge learned to care for the sick within the community of Kipkaren. The overwhelming need that fills this place reminds me of the story found in Matthew 14:15-21. Jesus, recognizing the hungry people, had compassion on them and told the disciples: “They don’t need to go away. You give them something to eat.” The resources they had were a mere five loaves of bread & two fish; but when surrendered to Jesus, it met the needs of a multitude. I,too, find myself in the midst of a multitude with great needs and hear Jesus reminding me: “They don’t need to go away. You give them something to eat.” So, I’ll offer the five loaves of bread and two fish and trust Jesus to multiply it. Thank you for your continued prayers and support.
Wednesday, September 22, 2004
Learning to trust
Stories to share...
It is a dream come true to be back in Kenya and working with Empowering Lives International. It is an exciting season as we are in the process of starting an orphanage in the village of Ilula, but it is also a time when the harsh reality of AIDS is very present. It is estimated that there are already over 1.2 million orphans in Kenya alone. As we gratefully received our first 10 orphans this past week to the children’s home, there are now little faces with names and hard stories to accompany that overwhelming statistic. I want to share the story of one. His name is Benson Kip Too.
His story is like so many others… His father died, and his mother followed a short time after. Her fresh grave, just a small distance from the hut remains as a constant reminder. Benson is one of nine children left behind, and His grandmother has taken them in but does not have resources to meet even the most basic needs of these children. It’s impossible to adequately describe in words the feelings I experienced in going to this home. There was so much suffering. We took Benson, who is 7, and his little 3 year old sister for HIV screening. Upon leaving the compound, the 11 year old brother began running after us. He was screaming and crying: “take me too”. Because of the abundance of need, ELI has decided to start the home by accepting children 3-9 years old. I can't begin to tell you the heaviness and brokenness that filled my heart at having to leave him behind. I will not ever forget the sound of his cries. Upon testing the kids for HIV, the 3 year old was diagnosed with HIV. Again, because we do not have the facilities to care adequately for kids with AIDS at this time, we were unable to accept the little girl into the home.
My heart was broken once again for these little ones who desperately need help. As great as the sorrow, I also rejoiced because the silent cries of a little boy named Benson had been heard. He came to the children’s home hungry, dirty and broken; but it is clear, he has come to a place where there is hope again. There are parents who love these children and are taking them as their own. There is food to eat. There are clothes to wear. There is an opportunity to go to school and be raised in an environment where love is given. On the day Benson arrived at the orphanage, there were five other orphans that sat in our laps as we drove to Ilula. One little boy began yelling, “tunaenda nymbani”. It says it all: “we are going home”.
With much thanks…
There is so much to be grateful for. I’ve been encouraged time and again by the emails so many have sent- it somehow makes the worlds that we are apart smaller. I was able to talk to my parents by phone the other day; ironically, I had better reception in the jungles of Africa than I typically would have on a good day in Los Angeles. It’s seems a bit strange- I don’t have electricity or running water, but we do have the availability of cell phones. But for it, I am grateful.
Thank you for all of the prayers you have prayed. God has granted me safe journeys as I’ve traveled many miles. I have been welcomed back by my friends in Kenya so graciously. There have already been many moments that I’ve just had to stand back in awe at the ways in which God is confirming this desire within my heart to care for AIDS patients through home-based care. The second day I was in Kenya, I met a lady who works as a social worker for an organization that is already implementing home-based care within the same area as I will be living. She has invited me, after I return from language school, to meet her co-workers and to go on home visits to see the care that is being given through this program. I also have learned of a 2 day training being offered in a nearby village on this very topic of home-based care and will be attending in mid-October. All of this to say, I know that God has been preparing me for this season of ministry.
I am currently in Arusha, Tanzania at a 3 week intensive school to study Swahili. There is much to learn; but bit by bit, I am getting it. Thank you for your continued prayers for me in this area. I am looking forward to returning to Kipkaren, Kenya to make use of all that I am learning.
Learning to trust…
If I were to describe this journey of returning to Africa in a phrase, it would be this one: I’m learning to trust. As I adjust to life within a new culture and am daily confronted with harsh realities that are difficult for me to understand, I keep being reminded that: “The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know Your name will trust in You, for You, Lord have never forsaken those who seek You" (Psalm 9:9-10). In Ruthless Trust, Brennan Manning sums up this theme with these words: “The reality of naked trust is the life of a pilgrim who leaves the nailed down, obvious, and secure, and walks into the unknown without any rational explanation to justify the decision or guarantee the future. Why? Because God has signaled the movement and offered it his presence and his promise”. Moment by moment, God is teaching me to trust Him and allowing me to walk in freedom simply as His child.
It is a dream come true to be back in Kenya and working with Empowering Lives International. It is an exciting season as we are in the process of starting an orphanage in the village of Ilula, but it is also a time when the harsh reality of AIDS is very present. It is estimated that there are already over 1.2 million orphans in Kenya alone. As we gratefully received our first 10 orphans this past week to the children’s home, there are now little faces with names and hard stories to accompany that overwhelming statistic. I want to share the story of one. His name is Benson Kip Too.
His story is like so many others… His father died, and his mother followed a short time after. Her fresh grave, just a small distance from the hut remains as a constant reminder. Benson is one of nine children left behind, and His grandmother has taken them in but does not have resources to meet even the most basic needs of these children. It’s impossible to adequately describe in words the feelings I experienced in going to this home. There was so much suffering. We took Benson, who is 7, and his little 3 year old sister for HIV screening. Upon leaving the compound, the 11 year old brother began running after us. He was screaming and crying: “take me too”. Because of the abundance of need, ELI has decided to start the home by accepting children 3-9 years old. I can't begin to tell you the heaviness and brokenness that filled my heart at having to leave him behind. I will not ever forget the sound of his cries. Upon testing the kids for HIV, the 3 year old was diagnosed with HIV. Again, because we do not have the facilities to care adequately for kids with AIDS at this time, we were unable to accept the little girl into the home.
My heart was broken once again for these little ones who desperately need help. As great as the sorrow, I also rejoiced because the silent cries of a little boy named Benson had been heard. He came to the children’s home hungry, dirty and broken; but it is clear, he has come to a place where there is hope again. There are parents who love these children and are taking them as their own. There is food to eat. There are clothes to wear. There is an opportunity to go to school and be raised in an environment where love is given. On the day Benson arrived at the orphanage, there were five other orphans that sat in our laps as we drove to Ilula. One little boy began yelling, “tunaenda nymbani”. It says it all: “we are going home”.
With much thanks…
There is so much to be grateful for. I’ve been encouraged time and again by the emails so many have sent- it somehow makes the worlds that we are apart smaller. I was able to talk to my parents by phone the other day; ironically, I had better reception in the jungles of Africa than I typically would have on a good day in Los Angeles. It’s seems a bit strange- I don’t have electricity or running water, but we do have the availability of cell phones. But for it, I am grateful.
Thank you for all of the prayers you have prayed. God has granted me safe journeys as I’ve traveled many miles. I have been welcomed back by my friends in Kenya so graciously. There have already been many moments that I’ve just had to stand back in awe at the ways in which God is confirming this desire within my heart to care for AIDS patients through home-based care. The second day I was in Kenya, I met a lady who works as a social worker for an organization that is already implementing home-based care within the same area as I will be living. She has invited me, after I return from language school, to meet her co-workers and to go on home visits to see the care that is being given through this program. I also have learned of a 2 day training being offered in a nearby village on this very topic of home-based care and will be attending in mid-October. All of this to say, I know that God has been preparing me for this season of ministry.
I am currently in Arusha, Tanzania at a 3 week intensive school to study Swahili. There is much to learn; but bit by bit, I am getting it. Thank you for your continued prayers for me in this area. I am looking forward to returning to Kipkaren, Kenya to make use of all that I am learning.
Learning to trust…
If I were to describe this journey of returning to Africa in a phrase, it would be this one: I’m learning to trust. As I adjust to life within a new culture and am daily confronted with harsh realities that are difficult for me to understand, I keep being reminded that: “The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know Your name will trust in You, for You, Lord have never forsaken those who seek You" (Psalm 9:9-10). In Ruthless Trust, Brennan Manning sums up this theme with these words: “The reality of naked trust is the life of a pilgrim who leaves the nailed down, obvious, and secure, and walks into the unknown without any rational explanation to justify the decision or guarantee the future. Why? Because God has signaled the movement and offered it his presence and his promise”. Moment by moment, God is teaching me to trust Him and allowing me to walk in freedom simply as His child.
Tuesday, August 03, 2004
Compelled to go
Four years ago I left for Kipkaren, a small village in Kenya, Africa, willing to be used to minister to the people physically, yet painfully aware of my own inadequacies as a nurse. I was unaware that this four-week mission trip would change my life. I helped deliver a baby on the floor of a mud hut. And I washed the open sores of a man dying of AIDS. I experienced brokenness and poverty. At the same time, I saw rich joy and inexpressible faith. I encountered a people and a culture that captured my heart and I knew I had found a place to serve.
But I had more to learn first. I earned my bachelor’s degree in nursing at Azusa Pacific University and have been working in the infectious disease unit at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center for the past two and a half years. After two more summer trips to Kenya, I realized that to truly give quality care, I would need even more education. In September 2002 I went back to school at Cal State Los Angeles to get my Masters in Nursing, with an emphasis in international healthcare, and become a Family Nurse Practitioner. I am currently in the process of completing my final project, creating a framework in which music is utilized within the home-based palliative care settings in Kenya to educate the family and caregiver and to promote dignity for HIV/AIDS patients during the dying process. My heart cries:
I see you, I hear you,
Though no words you say.
You are not alone,
You are not unknown.
Though sorrow may last for this night
May joy come with morning’s light
As peace rests upon your soul,
For you are not alone.
These are the lyrics of the song I’m writing for my final project, an example of the music that will be used to educate and to minister to the people of Africa where AIDS has ravaged through cities and villages indiscriminately destroying the physical, emotional and spiritual aspects of life. The implications of this disease have affected not only individuals and families but also communities and a continent at large. Within Kenya alone, it is estimated that nearly 2.5 million people are living with HIV/AIDS. Over 500 people die of AIDS every day, most between the ages of 15 and 49.
It has been said that “the ultimate tragedy is depersonalization – dying in an alien and sterile environment, separated from the spiritual nourishment that comes from being able to reach out to a loving hand, separated from a desire to experience the things that make life worth living, separated from hope.” AIDS has done this to too many in Kenya – it has stripped them of their dignity and left them to die by themselves. This is the burden God has put on my heart: that people should not have to die alone.
So this September I will be returning to Kipkaren to work with Empowering Lives International, a small non-profit organization working in Central and East Africa. ELI’s mission is to “empower the poor and oppressed that they may be able to know, worship and serve God without hindrance, and to motivate and involve others worldwide to invest their lives and gifts in this same mission.” They are dedicated to helping people in impoverished countries recognize their importance in the eyes of God and to breaking the cycle of poverty that chokes out the potential and hope for a better life physically and spiritually. For more information on ELI, please visit www.empoweringlives.org.
While in Kipkaren, I will be working out of a small clinic doing community development and health education and caring for the medical needs of the people there. Once a week I will travel to Ilula, a village in which ELI will be opening an orphanage, where I will be in charge of the health of these children. I will also be in the Congo for about a month where I will be doing physical examinations including immunizations and de-worming for 277 children at a school in the slums.
Already as I prepare to leave, I have been overwhelmed with the way God has brought people into my life to partner with me in this ministry. I know that I cannot accomplish the things He has called me to without the ongoing support of family and friends. One of the greatest ways you can support me is through constant prayer. Pray for wisdom to know how to best educate the Kenyan people about the consequences of AIDS in such a way that it will lead to true life change. Pray that the cycles of disease will be broken. And pray that God’s love for these people will be recognized and received through the physical touch we are able to provide.
I am amazed and truly humbled when I consider the journey that has led me to this place.
My life has been transformed as God has revealed His heart for the financially poor and the poor in spirit. Step by step He has been placing within me a passion to join Him in such a powerful way that moving to Kenya does not feel like a huge leap. It’s simply another step. Without a doubt, the challenges ahead are vast. The AIDS crisis alone feels overwhelmingly too hopeless to face, but it is real and must not be ignored. It is the love of Christ that compels me to go; and I do so, utterly dependent on the God who says He is able.
But I had more to learn first. I earned my bachelor’s degree in nursing at Azusa Pacific University and have been working in the infectious disease unit at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center for the past two and a half years. After two more summer trips to Kenya, I realized that to truly give quality care, I would need even more education. In September 2002 I went back to school at Cal State Los Angeles to get my Masters in Nursing, with an emphasis in international healthcare, and become a Family Nurse Practitioner. I am currently in the process of completing my final project, creating a framework in which music is utilized within the home-based palliative care settings in Kenya to educate the family and caregiver and to promote dignity for HIV/AIDS patients during the dying process. My heart cries:
I see you, I hear you,
Though no words you say.
You are not alone,
You are not unknown.
Though sorrow may last for this night
May joy come with morning’s light
As peace rests upon your soul,
For you are not alone.
These are the lyrics of the song I’m writing for my final project, an example of the music that will be used to educate and to minister to the people of Africa where AIDS has ravaged through cities and villages indiscriminately destroying the physical, emotional and spiritual aspects of life. The implications of this disease have affected not only individuals and families but also communities and a continent at large. Within Kenya alone, it is estimated that nearly 2.5 million people are living with HIV/AIDS. Over 500 people die of AIDS every day, most between the ages of 15 and 49.
It has been said that “the ultimate tragedy is depersonalization – dying in an alien and sterile environment, separated from the spiritual nourishment that comes from being able to reach out to a loving hand, separated from a desire to experience the things that make life worth living, separated from hope.” AIDS has done this to too many in Kenya – it has stripped them of their dignity and left them to die by themselves. This is the burden God has put on my heart: that people should not have to die alone.
So this September I will be returning to Kipkaren to work with Empowering Lives International, a small non-profit organization working in Central and East Africa. ELI’s mission is to “empower the poor and oppressed that they may be able to know, worship and serve God without hindrance, and to motivate and involve others worldwide to invest their lives and gifts in this same mission.” They are dedicated to helping people in impoverished countries recognize their importance in the eyes of God and to breaking the cycle of poverty that chokes out the potential and hope for a better life physically and spiritually. For more information on ELI, please visit www.empoweringlives.org.
While in Kipkaren, I will be working out of a small clinic doing community development and health education and caring for the medical needs of the people there. Once a week I will travel to Ilula, a village in which ELI will be opening an orphanage, where I will be in charge of the health of these children. I will also be in the Congo for about a month where I will be doing physical examinations including immunizations and de-worming for 277 children at a school in the slums.
Already as I prepare to leave, I have been overwhelmed with the way God has brought people into my life to partner with me in this ministry. I know that I cannot accomplish the things He has called me to without the ongoing support of family and friends. One of the greatest ways you can support me is through constant prayer. Pray for wisdom to know how to best educate the Kenyan people about the consequences of AIDS in such a way that it will lead to true life change. Pray that the cycles of disease will be broken. And pray that God’s love for these people will be recognized and received through the physical touch we are able to provide.
I am amazed and truly humbled when I consider the journey that has led me to this place.
My life has been transformed as God has revealed His heart for the financially poor and the poor in spirit. Step by step He has been placing within me a passion to join Him in such a powerful way that moving to Kenya does not feel like a huge leap. It’s simply another step. Without a doubt, the challenges ahead are vast. The AIDS crisis alone feels overwhelmingly too hopeless to face, but it is real and must not be ignored. It is the love of Christ that compels me to go; and I do so, utterly dependent on the God who says He is able.
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